Everything has it's beauty, but not everyone sees it. - Confucius
Sometimes the picture doesn't have to be perfect; it's the captured moment that counts. - me
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Friday, 3 July 2009

The solaf

Something a bit different for the 100th post.

The first chapter of a childrens story I wrote about six years ago.

Chapter One

The solaf hauled himself out of the marmalade pot, and sat on the rim………thinking momentarily. Another day. Must be. He had just woke up, so it’s another day. He surveyed his kitchen kingdom. What a mess. Some party last night, but he couldn’t remember much about it. Some balloons were bobbing in the draft by the open door, covered in…………yuk! Is that…….yuk! It was. Yuk!

“Oi, what you staring at?” the red one shouted, head bouncing off the tiled floor.
The solaf just stared back. He didn’t want to get in no argument with a balloon at this time of day. He gazed past the yuky balloons, through the open door, his eyes settling on the tv, blinking in the corner of the room. He yawned.
Startled, he slipped from the rim, and landed with a bump on the worktop.
The green one had decided to speak. “What’s your problem?” it continued.
‘I can’t be bothered with this’, thought the solaf, rubbing his back.

“Nothing……..no problem. I slipped. I’m ok now,” he offered, standing.

“NO. Why you staring at us like that!” now the yellow one was getting in on the act. The three balloons slowly began to slither across the floor towards him, aided by the yuk and the draft from the door.

‘Oh, trouble now’ thought the solaf.

Just then there was a loud crash from upstairs. Then another. A football came bouncing down the stairs, followed by feet. The solaf froze. One of the humans was up. He forgot about the balloons for a moment. This could be bigger trouble. He edged his way back, slowly; squeezing his frame behind an empty packet of crisps, discarded on the worktop. The balloons were still frantically bobbing in the breeze. The ball rolled into the kitchen, knocking the balloons to the side. The feet followed.

The solaf peered from his hiding place, placing a tiny hand over his mouth to silence his heavy breathing.

It was Roger. He was horrible. He was a human child. But a horrible one.
“Yuk!” boomed Roger, kicking the balloons across the floor. They bounced against the cupboards and glided across the floor leaving a trail of yuk behind them. The solaf peered towards the ball, their eyes meeting. For a tiny second it was all quiet.

Then BANG! The solaf’s eyes shot to the sound. There was Roger, grinning. BANG! Smiling. BANG! Laughing. He’d stamped on the balloons. All that was left was a rubbery yuk on the floor, oozing from beneath his foot. The solaf stared in disbelief.
He didn’t like balloons much, but that was no way for anything to go.

Roger turned, looking for the ball. It had rolled into the corner by the fridge, seeking sanctuary.
“Breakfast first,” Roger boomed, “then some footy.” He strode towards the worktop, grabbing the marmalade. Two slices of bread were slapped down, and spread with butter. Marmalade next. The knife tossed into the sink along with all the rest. He turned, and walked into the room, where the tv was flickering. Then it was quiet.

The solaf slowly emerged from his crisp packet cave, gazing around the kitchen. The ball was still by the fridge. The balloons, or what was left of them, were in the middle of the floor, a multicoloured mess. He felt sad. What a terrible start to the day.

He shuffled his way to the sink, peering in.
‘Oh dear,’ he thought, ‘terrible mess.’
All along the worktop was rubbish. Half eaten food, crumbs, spilt drink………..where to start. He was lost in his thoughts. The silence drowning out all sounds. All sounds. He didn’t hear a thing until……..

Suddenly it all started to go dark. Human fingers were closing around him, as he was lifted upwards, the worktop below rapidly disappearing. He started to struggle, but it was no good.

Then blackness and silence; save for his own struggled breathing.


  1. intense! you had me on the edge of my seat. what is a solaf? who got him? what was the yuck on the balloons?

    more more more!!!


  2. Keith....wow!! How fun!! I loved it. A perfect way to mark your 100th post. I must have a lot of kid in me because I was reading with rapt attention. Did you try to find a publisher? I can't wait to find out what a solaf is and what happens next. :-)

  3. Look, I was so into the story, that I forgot to say 'Congrats' on 100!

  4. Many congratulations on your 100th post Keith!

    Well that was exciting stuff! I've been trying to work out the name solaf, I've tried it backwards which doesn't work and it doesn't seem to be an anagram, of course you may never tell us ;)

    It's very imaginative and has quite a surreal quality, have you tried it out on any children yet?

  5. Im hooked, great piece very imaginative, giving balloons a soul and having us feel sorrow at their abrupt end, Bravo! And I googled solaf, got strange results....the domain is open if you want it! Lol Great story.Congratulations on 100 super posts!

  6. Thanks for the congrats Jen, Kelly, ShySongbird and Dixxe. Means a lot; thanks.

    Jen, hmmm, who got the solaf and what is ‘it’?
    Some of that may be revealed as the story progresses lol

    Kelly, thanks. Glad you enjoyed the first chapter. I had a lot of fun writing it at the time. Not sure if a publisher would be interested. Nice thought though; have to think about that :)

    ShySongbird, thank you. Not tried it out on any kids yet, only adults. It seemed to go down quite well. I think the ‘child’ is still in us all, if we let it out.
    And the name? I was hoping it wouldn’t really mean anything at the time I did it, just an odd name that could be remembered, and easy to say. But as Dixxe mentions, googleing produces some strange results. lol

    Thanks Dixxe, Google does throw up some rather dodgy results unfortunately. :(
    Hadn’t thought of the domain name till you mentioned it; so I bought it today.
    Might be useful ;)

  7. I love balloons, Keith - after every birthday here we have them kicking around the place for weeks, can't bear to pop 'em!
    But what happens next? I don't know if I'm going to sleep tonight after this.
    Congrats on the century - here's to your next!

  8. Thanks for your comment Rob.
    Yea, something about balloons I think. A piece of rubber that swells to takes on a life, when we breathe into it, and put a smile on our faces.
    Maybe I'm cracking up lol

  9. Keith,Congrats on your 100th.The story is so interesting...wanted to know what a solaf was and I too did google...the results...ha ha ha.Guess would have to wait till you tell me.You've got amazng imagination.Wish I had the same, at least would have a lot of stories to tell our 2 yr old:)Waiting for more!!!

  10. Thank you for your kind words NatureStop.
    I think some of those google results are best left alone lol

  11. Keith, some fantastic Images on show.
    Loved the colour assortment.

  12. A brilliant opening to your story Keith. It definitely leaves the reader wanting to know what happens next.

  13. John of JRandSue, thank you.
    For the other post? lol Cheers :)

    Thanks John, I'll have to do chapter two next week I think. ;)

  14. Can't wait to get some more of this adventure. ;)

  15. Thanks Andrea.
    Chapter Two probably Friday ;)

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